Championing the Student Ministry Parent
Parents are the primary disciple-makers of their kids.
You've heard that. We all agree to it because that is an emphasis we see throughout scripture. Deuteronomy 6 tells parents to teach (literally sharpen) their kids with the words of the Shema (the Old Testament confession of faith), to talk about the things of the LORD with their kids. This also repeats in Psalm 78, "We will tell a future generation the praiseworthy acts of the LORD." The New Testament commands parents to bring up their children in training and the instruction of the Lord (Eph 6:4).
But let me admit two things: sometimes, I, the student minister, am better equipped to disciple their teenager. And often, the parent agrees.
It is easy for parents look to the church to provide a product called "discipleship" for their student to consume. It may be because they are tired, too busy, or simply don’t know how. Nevertheless, they fail to incorporate healthy rhythms and practices of faith into the daily lives of their students. Parents often admit they know they should disciple their kids but feel ill-equipped to be a disciple-maker or fear it is too late to start.
That is why every student ministry needs to have a parent-equipping element to it. Ephesians 4:11-12 tells us that God has given the Church members to be workers in the church and to equip the saints for ministry. Ultimately, to build up the body of Christ.
Yes, we spiritually care for students. We also need to equip parents to spiritually care for their teenagers and build them us at the disicple makers they are made to be.
Here are four ways to start…
Host a "Parent Equip"A Parent Equip is a gathering for parents in your church to receive training and in-depth teaching on a particular topic. At my church, we host these about three times a year, and they are well thought out, well-planned, and well-executed. They have to be worth the parents' time. They usually run between 90-120 minutes with childcare and light refreshments. We also use this space to bring in outside voices to speak to our church. Our hope is that it is an active learning environment, allowing our parents to digest the material they have heard, process it with others, and ask questions for further understanding.
Create Easy-To-Read Equipping Newsletters Our monthly newsletter communicates all the essential dates and information regarding our ministry. Still, we recently launched a separate newsletter to equip our parents to have conversations with their teenagers. We're covering things as basic as how they can have a conversation with their teenager or child about the sermon they heard at church to how they can talk about sex, technology, and depression. These are 500-800 word emails with questions they can ask and two to three resources of varying kinds they can look up for more information.
Create Easy Avenues for Parents to Disciple Their Kids We call these "Milestones" and they are opportunities for parents to discipline their kids from birth to adulthood. Some of these milestones are more hands-on; some are markers for both parents and kids to remember the Lord's faithfulness in their story. But in your ministry, you should create opportunities for parents to disciple their kids and call parents into their task of raising their kids to be disciples. Let them be the heroes. Create a space for parents to pray for their kids, speak words of encouragement, and help them learn how to read the Bible. Here are some milestone examples: baptism, middle school & high school blessings, missions trips, and graduation.
Meet with Parents There is no greater tool in gathering the pulse of the discipleship in your families and parents than meeting face-to-face with parents. Whether one-on-one over coffee or in a small group with a handful of parents, meeting with parents can help you understand where your parents are. Create questions you can ask every parent and put their answers down in a spreadsheet to help you process how they need to be equipped. Go through a book or read the Bible together, get them talking, then sit back and listen.
I'd love to hear how you are equipping your church's parents to be the disciplemakers God made them to be! Please send us an email or comment on our post on Instagram.